I'm super excited today for two reasons. One, I'm back to the bright lights of Shenton Way again, pounding the streets just like the other guys in their suits. Second, this is a brand new talk series for me.
When I got the brief from the client about wanting to do something radically different and broach the evergreen topic of conversation chemistry dating tips between men and women, to be honest, I was startled. After all, I need to justify that I'm not a pickup artist nor relationship expert. My roots hark back to fitness and grooming.

But when I thought about it, conversation chemistry between a guy and a girl is essentially all about the remaining 7% that makes up our overall image score. The 7% is premised primarily on how we communicate with others. This includes both the verbal and non-verbal aspects; and the chemistry vibes of course.


I simply love the crowd today. Yes, they are the staff of Aviva Singapore. The only difference is that all the staff attending my talk today are singles. Responsive, fun and energetic - that's the trademark of the crowd today. All so eager to learn as much as I am equally geared up to share as much. Plus the arrangement of the tables in a U shape allows me to work the room to the maximum effect by coming up close to each and every participant :)

If you ask me what creates the spark between a man and a woman, I'll tell you it boils down all to the topic of communication. In today's society, there are some topics that are considered off limits or even taboo. These include race, religion, politics and sex. No one in the right frame of mind would spark off a debate in any one of these topics after successfully scoring the first date.

If you are lost for topics to choose from, I offer you three perennial favourites to choose from. They are (in no particular order of merit) food, shopping and travel. Singaporeans simply love to eat, shop and travel. Plan your topics around these three big topics and you can chunk up or down easily. What's your most memorable holiday? Why do you love shopping at Topshop? Are there any foods you don't take?



Now that you have the right topic(s) to talk about, it's only half the battle won. The other half would depend on your body language, speaking techniques and ability to sustain the conversation.

As a man, what signs do you read in a lady that she's interested in you and this date would eventually result in the second date...nth date? Likewise for a lady, how do you read the body language and speech patterns of a guy to ascertain if he reciprocates your sentiments?

Never one to disappoint my audience,
I left them with 7 of my all-time useful art of conversation tips. And you would never guessed they resonated well with the audience as I saw heads nodding and smiles widening on faces. Sometimes, it's the simple things we do in life that get people to notice and remember us for all the good reasons.

With my confidence at an all-time high now and the positive acclaim from both the Aviva's management team standing behind, I can safely predict that another run for yet another organisation is definitely on the cards. And I'm going to include this in my workshop offerings. Yeah :)




Even though words only make up 7% of our total image score, it is still important to choose the right words when communicating with others. This is especially so because we do not live in a vacuum. Like it or not, we are surrounded by people – our colleagues, friends, families, suppliers and even strangers.

While words have the power to motivate, heal and make others feel loved; words too have the power to hurt, demoralize and inflict pain. Therefore, choosing the right words to use in any situation is an art in itself. And there lies the beauty of NLP.

NLP or Neuro-Linguistic Programming continues to wield a ‘mystic’ power over millions of believers since it was formally introduced by Richard Bandler and John Grinder during the 1970s.

But let the truth be said that NLP is not something reserved only for the scholarly, bright and upper-class. It is a very useful tool which we can all adapt for usage in our everyday lives as long as we know how to. Essentially, NLP is concerned with how one knows what one knows.

This in essence was the message I brought across to the staff of HK Hardware & Engineering Pte Ltd today.

Comprising the management team seated right upfront and the rest of the staff who signed up for it in the back tables, I saw many a pair of doe eyes looking at me in bewilderment.

No, I didn’t project myself as a demigod. Neither did I speak in a tongue so alien to their native Singaporean or Malaysian ears. What I did was simply lift the veil behind NLP and demystified it completely.

I’m grateful for this gift of mine which is to simplify difficult to grasp concepts into easy, bite-sized ones.




What NLP can really do for everyone who chooses to embrace the different tenets and integrate them into our daily lives is to help enhance our relationships with others. This is done through adopting the right representational systems. For example, if the speaker primarily uses visual words to communicate his thoughts, I too would choose visual words in my response to him. If he was more kinesthetic, then so would I. It is this simple. But of course, you would have to observe other types of systems too.

If you would like to unlock the power of NLP today and build better relationships with your colleagues, bosses, subordinates, family, friends or lover, contact me now.


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